DEFINE LOVE, PLEASE
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Dinah Syaza280193
Quirky.
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ultra.dee@hotmail.com
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ILI NADRAH SASHA HETTY ZIMAH BEE SYIQY DOUBLEDEE HALYYMA RAFIDAH YANI FARAHIN HASWEEN SITINURUL WILSON MARSH AZLAN FAUZIE ASH FATE DEERANAE SYIKIN SHAFA SCRIPTZ NADYRA SHAFIQAH ATYRA LIY ALLEN HUDA AMALINA FARHAN
ILI NADRAH SASHA HETTY ZIMAH BEE SYIQY DOUBLEDEE HALYYMA RAFIDAH YANI FARAHIN HASWEEN SITINURUL WILSON MARSH AZLAN FAUZIE ASH FATE DEERANAE SYIKIN SHAFA SCRIPTZ NADYRA SHAFIQAH ATYRA LIY ALLEN HUDA AMALINA FARHAN
Thursday, March 12, 2009, 6:42 AM
PAPER HEART
Getting to know what love really is simply unknown thing to do.
Haha.
i really love to see people around me in love.
It gets me to their situation & i really want them to be together or some sort.
Though; i know i myself didnt have enough love.
But what the hell; i dont care about myself.
I really love to see some one head over heels on some one.
It makes me remember the past of mine.
The time is use to feel that way.
Now? neh.
Just having the feeling of 'rather be alone'
maybe.
Seeing the another side;
which is more brighter & happier.
But im just left here dark.
i dont mind.
As long im still smiling & breathing i told ya;
i still live my life to the fullest.
discovering new things every single day.
The laughter i burst out loud.
Healing myself bit by bit.
baybeh; i know i know.
it aint easy.
Fighting everything by myself.
& oo yeah.
im doing it.
SLOWLY & EVENTUALLY.
Its just another thoughts of my mind on every post.
I want to change as what i told ya.
So this is kinda like a progress report.
Haha. when i fall, when im strong, when im neutral.
I know when.
But now.
im neither changing nor falling.
Just a bit of tumbling.
But i quickly stood up(:
Love story of each person; i heard.
Was the sweetest thing;
yet the most killing thing.
I wondered will i ever hear the perfect ending.
The perfect never ending story.
I just dont think so.
& sometime i tried begging god;
to make my life better.
but i see what the use in times.
its really part of your mindset & part of god's written work.
So; if its written means its all written.
EMBRACING.
i tried so many times.
Some succeed some not.
but who cares.
i tried and that is all that matters.
are you sure dinah;?
Getting to know what love really is simply unknown thing to do.
Haha.
i really love to see people around me in love.
It gets me to their situation & i really want them to be together or some sort.
Though; i know i myself didnt have enough love.
But what the hell; i dont care about myself.
I really love to see some one head over heels on some one.
It makes me remember the past of mine.
The time is use to feel that way.
Now? neh.
Just having the feeling of 'rather be alone'
maybe.
Seeing the another side;
which is more brighter & happier.
But im just left here dark.
i dont mind.
As long im still smiling & breathing i told ya;
i still live my life to the fullest.
discovering new things every single day.
The laughter i burst out loud.
Healing myself bit by bit.
baybeh; i know i know.
it aint easy.
Fighting everything by myself.
& oo yeah.
im doing it.
SLOWLY & EVENTUALLY.
Its just another thoughts of my mind on every post.
I want to change as what i told ya.
So this is kinda like a progress report.
Haha. when i fall, when im strong, when im neutral.
I know when.
But now.
im neither changing nor falling.
Just a bit of tumbling.
But i quickly stood up(:
Love story of each person; i heard.
Was the sweetest thing;
yet the most killing thing.
I wondered will i ever hear the perfect ending.
The perfect never ending story.
I just dont think so.
& sometime i tried begging god;
to make my life better.
but i see what the use in times.
its really part of your mindset & part of god's written work.
So; if its written means its all written.
EMBRACING.
i tried so many times.
Some succeed some not.
but who cares.
i tried and that is all that matters.
are you sure dinah;?
''All this time I was wasting,
Hoping you would come around
I've been giving out chances every time
And all you do is let me down
And it's taking me this long
Baby but I figured you out
And you're thinking we'll be fine again,
But not this time around
You don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don't wanna hurt anymore
And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did - before
You're not sorry, no no ohhh
Looking so innocent,
I might believe you if I didn't know
Could've loved you all my life
If you hadn't left me waiting in the cold
And you got your share of secrets
And I'm tired of being last to know
And now you're asking me to listen
Cause it's worked each time before
But you don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don't wanna hurt anymore
And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did - before
You're not sorry, no no, ohhh
You're not sorry no no ohhh
You had me falling for you honey
And it never would've gone away, no
You used to shine so bright
But I watched all of it fade
So you don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
There's nothing left to beg for
And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did - before
You're not sorry, no no ohhh''
Taylor Swift-You're Not Sorry.
so here again im reading the same love novels again & again. Wondering when it will be my turn. My heart simply gave a temporary fullstop from feeling any emotions again. I do not know why. Things took off really well and to know its all ending. Simply i say sucks. I watch Britney's documentary again and again. I just could not believe after all she had been through she is staying real strong. Im just amazed. Yes. too amaze. and sometimes eventhough im in the world in my own tiny freaking brain just cursing my life; something will just slap me awake. Be it my friends or just wind. Sitting here, waiting for answers to be reveal. Reading all the histories. And sometime i dont even know what im talking about. I just blurt out everything. I dont care it makes sense at all or not.
Looking up high at the moody dark blue sky with stars that are hard to find from the window at my moderate room, calms me. A soothing thing i did every single day without fail. A gentle wind hits my face. The cool air breeze by me, the tingle wingle feeling again. I love it. I love wind. I love gentle wind. Or even sometime i imagine i had a new friend; imaginary new friend that would take me away from this tiny room & go to the moon, Sit at the moon look at the earth & eat ice cream. I no its the most impossible thing to do. But i can dream, cant i? so yes again. Imaginary Friend; are you playing hide and go seek, cause im done playing. Come out come out where ever you are. Im lost without you. Lets play other things instead; catching maybe?
I've been giving out chances every time
And all you do is let me down
And it's taking me this long
Baby but I figured you out
And you're thinking we'll be fine again,
But not this time around
You don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don't wanna hurt anymore
And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did - before
You're not sorry, no no ohhh
Looking so innocent,
I might believe you if I didn't know
Could've loved you all my life
If you hadn't left me waiting in the cold
And you got your share of secrets
And I'm tired of being last to know
And now you're asking me to listen
Cause it's worked each time before
But you don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
Don't wanna hurt anymore
And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did - before
You're not sorry, no no, ohhh
You're not sorry no no ohhh
You had me falling for you honey
And it never would've gone away, no
You used to shine so bright
But I watched all of it fade
So you don't have to call anymore
I won't pick up the phone
This is the last straw
There's nothing left to beg for
And you can tell me that you're sorry
But I don't believe you baby
Like I did - before
You're not sorry, no no ohhh''
Taylor Swift-You're Not Sorry.
so here again im reading the same love novels again & again. Wondering when it will be my turn. My heart simply gave a temporary fullstop from feeling any emotions again. I do not know why. Things took off really well and to know its all ending. Simply i say sucks. I watch Britney's documentary again and again. I just could not believe after all she had been through she is staying real strong. Im just amazed. Yes. too amaze. and sometimes eventhough im in the world in my own tiny freaking brain just cursing my life; something will just slap me awake. Be it my friends or just wind. Sitting here, waiting for answers to be reveal. Reading all the histories. And sometime i dont even know what im talking about. I just blurt out everything. I dont care it makes sense at all or not.
Looking up high at the moody dark blue sky with stars that are hard to find from the window at my moderate room, calms me. A soothing thing i did every single day without fail. A gentle wind hits my face. The cool air breeze by me, the tingle wingle feeling again. I love it. I love wind. I love gentle wind. Or even sometime i imagine i had a new friend; imaginary new friend that would take me away from this tiny room & go to the moon, Sit at the moon look at the earth & eat ice cream. I no its the most impossible thing to do. But i can dream, cant i? so yes again. Imaginary Friend; are you playing hide and go seek, cause im done playing. Come out come out where ever you are. Im lost without you. Lets play other things instead; catching maybe?
DeeDee;
back to being childish again.
hees.
YESTERDAY:
Dance Practice wooots.
back to being childish again.
hees.
YESTERDAY:
Dance Practice wooots.
Caught in their act.(:
& yes hetty's armpit is nice to be smelled.kidding
SASHA: blueks.
& yes soon i'll be able to do it.
(:When i have the courage to do it.
eventually.
HEADSTAND HERE I COME.
HE JUST DO IT WITH EASE!
-_-
grr.
SO;
dance prac was a crazy-rack.
WOO.
People dancing everywhere.
For me; i was busy looking at my art coursework & taking people's photograph.
then; i couldnt stand the urge seeing people dance & im not,
so i ran off and start boogey woogey.
Then hetty start doing headstand.
Then Everyone was trying doing it.
Then people sharing all kind off breaks.
Hetty called it a HEADS SESSION.
if you were passing by the dome; i bet you guys thought we were praying.
LOLS. every head was down.
Some look like frogs.
So i did try. Hetty helped me. thank you baybeh.
i was afraid to push myself up.
I didnt make but hetty motivated me.
Then i pushed real hard & she get a grip of my both legs.
& she told me all i need was balance.
But i was really scared of my neck breaking.
I always think twice if i was about to do anything that can result to some of my body parts breaking.
But I really want to do it.
I tried doing it at wall. but neh.
im too scared.
then i tried alot of method to do it by myself.
Funny. Really.
Afiq was like MUST DO MUST DO.
Even syiq.
then went off sasha doing it like monkey(:
I was temporary envy that she can do it without support.
CB.
haha.
AND
V or Vimal doing everything with ease.
I literally put on a face like this 0.0 much more bigger.
i swear.
Everyone was doing their own thing.
Freestyle and stuff.
So yesterday CRAFTED a smile of my moody face yesterday
yippy sia.
SO reach home at 12pm
& chat with my Sayang Habibah.
Chatting with her always make my day.
thank you(:
11.28pm
12march09
currently: massaging my own half of the head.
tuning in to love story by taylor swift.
i miss alot of people.
& PPD GETTING LOW AGAIN.
fishcake bersambal betul!
shish.
& panda eyes are gained.
ChiB.
Its my bloody fault!
I just cant sleep.
I need to pay someone to sing me a lullaby or if doesnt work every single night;
the someone punch me & knock me over to my dream land.
Really.
sanggup nak bayar sia
NOTE:
BLOODY HELL NCC CAMP FALLS TOMORROW TILL SUNDAY.
i shall miss my computer.
Stupid slow computer.
i will be missing for considered two days.
still can be message(:
& yes soon i'll be able to do it.
(:When i have the courage to do it.
eventually.
HEADSTAND HERE I COME.
HE JUST DO IT WITH EASE!-_-
grr.
SO;
dance prac was a crazy-rack.
WOO.
People dancing everywhere.
For me; i was busy looking at my art coursework & taking people's photograph.
then; i couldnt stand the urge seeing people dance & im not,
so i ran off and start boogey woogey.
Then hetty start doing headstand.
Then Everyone was trying doing it.
Then people sharing all kind off breaks.
Hetty called it a HEADS SESSION.
if you were passing by the dome; i bet you guys thought we were praying.
LOLS. every head was down.
Some look like frogs.
So i did try. Hetty helped me. thank you baybeh.
i was afraid to push myself up.
I didnt make but hetty motivated me.
Then i pushed real hard & she get a grip of my both legs.
& she told me all i need was balance.
But i was really scared of my neck breaking.
I always think twice if i was about to do anything that can result to some of my body parts breaking.
But I really want to do it.
I tried doing it at wall. but neh.
im too scared.
then i tried alot of method to do it by myself.
Funny. Really.
Afiq was like MUST DO MUST DO.
Even syiq.
then went off sasha doing it like monkey(:
I was temporary envy that she can do it without support.
CB.
haha.
AND
V or Vimal doing everything with ease.
I literally put on a face like this 0.0 much more bigger.
i swear.
Everyone was doing their own thing.
Freestyle and stuff.
So yesterday CRAFTED a smile of my moody face yesterday
yippy sia.
SO reach home at 12pm
& chat with my Sayang Habibah.
Chatting with her always make my day. thank you(:
TODAY:
school was bore.
Bore to the core.
wish it could be better.
Alien crash to our school would be much better.
English class was the first period.
I was so tired, that i fell asleep while i was copying these cloze passage that Ms L.Y.Y instructed us to do.
I swear not even one minute i could get a nice nap;
JINGXIANG woke me up.
I was like fish you.
then i remember he was suppose to do it.
It was part of a deal, to keep each other awake.
Rafidah on the other hand; couldnt care less.
haha. I sat in the middle of those two maniacs.
PE, i lied to teacher i was sick.
running 2.4km; walao. im drained and sleepy need to run some more.
No thanks eh!
so i will run on term 2.
(:
Maths: was understandable.
haha.
JINGXIANG as per usual crack his crappy jokes to the class.
Annoyed the teacher and stuff.
That keeps me awake.
YAY!
Test when on quite okay.
im happy.
Biology; filing file only.
& i eat spicy prawn crackers with lily and kamarul at the side.
SECRETLY.
CE: testimonial writing stuff shit.
i have no idea what to talk about my self.
I got nice boobs?
Eew not!
there it goes.
Thanks nurul farahin for sending me all the way to y bustop.
Wee. Love ya.!! (:
nice talk we had.
more more more.
p.s i pass my biology test.
11 & half / 15.
i could have get 12 and the half.
STUPID PETALS.
i put sepal.
DUMB ME.
at least okay, i didnt study that much.
i just browse through the paper.
now im having migraines. SHIT.school was bore.
Bore to the core.
wish it could be better.
Alien crash to our school would be much better.
English class was the first period.
I was so tired, that i fell asleep while i was copying these cloze passage that Ms L.Y.Y instructed us to do.
I swear not even one minute i could get a nice nap;
JINGXIANG woke me up.
I was like fish you.
then i remember he was suppose to do it.
It was part of a deal, to keep each other awake.
Rafidah on the other hand; couldnt care less.
haha. I sat in the middle of those two maniacs.
PE, i lied to teacher i was sick.
running 2.4km; walao. im drained and sleepy need to run some more.
No thanks eh!
so i will run on term 2.
(:
Maths: was understandable.
haha.
JINGXIANG as per usual crack his crappy jokes to the class.
Annoyed the teacher and stuff.
That keeps me awake.
YAY!
Test when on quite okay.
im happy.
Biology; filing file only.
& i eat spicy prawn crackers with lily and kamarul at the side.
SECRETLY.
CE: testimonial writing stuff shit.
i have no idea what to talk about my self.
I got nice boobs?
Eew not!
there it goes.
Thanks nurul farahin for sending me all the way to y bustop.
Wee. Love ya.!! (:
nice talk we had.
more more more.
p.s i pass my biology test.
11 & half / 15.
i could have get 12 and the half.
STUPID PETALS.
i put sepal.
DUMB ME.
at least okay, i didnt study that much.
i just browse through the paper.
11.28pm
12march09
currently: massaging my own half of the head.
tuning in to love story by taylor swift.
i miss alot of people.
& PPD GETTING LOW AGAIN.
fishcake bersambal betul!
shish.
& panda eyes are gained.
ChiB.
Its my bloody fault!
I just cant sleep.
I need to pay someone to sing me a lullaby or if doesnt work every single night;
the someone punch me & knock me over to my dream land.
Really.
sanggup nak bayar sia
NOTE:
BLOODY HELL NCC CAMP FALLS TOMORROW TILL SUNDAY.
i shall miss my computer.
Stupid slow computer.
i will be missing for considered two days.
still can be message(: